The gods deposit a glowing coin
In the slot of horizon to swiftly join
A landscape and shadow in ambient sable.
The remnant of daytime is fading to fable.
We stumble, succor of lamp is brusque,
For the pressure of nighttide made shine subfusc.
Our censure is blind, we're unable to narrow
Precisely which footfall set nature to harrow.
We have no opening spared by murk
When the vapory pitch does invasive work.
We're losing the lumens from soul of a human
As blackness disbands each ethereal lumen.
Beyond a gap in diurnal light,
This internal attack is supernal plight.
With quiddity riddled, empyrean sentry
Will quickly forbid my empyrean entry.
adore the first stanza especially "In the slot of horizon to swiftly join
ReplyDeleteA landscape and shadow in ambient sable" gorgeous imagery!
I really like the first stanza too. I imagined the Gods putting coins in slot machines for some reason.. I know that wasn't what you intended but it's what I pictured from putting a coin in the slot.
ReplyDeleteGreat imagery all through this. Some fabulous use of words too.
Diurnal light, ethereal lumen. Brilliant.
Quite a 'dark' poem today, Jack. Not a very positive commentary on human nature. "Empyrean," however, is a word whose meaning I know not...so I fear I might have missed something of the conclusion.
ReplyDeleterage and agony replaced by a melancholic assessment of human existence.but such is the burden of the primal fall.but theological assessments are to your taste, then there's always the rose of light which Dante saw.May be so can we.let there be light!
ReplyDeleteWonderful! - such assurance with the very linguisto-poetic quiddities you grieve - I see our enlightenment joined here, but the first step in every recovery is admitting that we have a problem.
ReplyDeleteI feel fated to be forbidden that same entry. And I don't think that bothers me as much as losing my lumens. But what the hell, when darkness descends, it was but fated.
ReplyDeleteGreat write Jack--for me, especially the first stanza--but throughout--just great sense of language and mood--
ReplyDeleteGood Writing Gods, Jack, you've done it this time! The sensation of light blacking out, the darkness spreading like "the great nothing". And your perfect use of the word subfusc is admirable. I found myself wondering, "Did he use that as his springboard? That one amazing word?" I reread just to feel the dread and hope for the light to pervade.
ReplyDelete"Beyond a gap in diurnal light,
ReplyDeleteThis internal attack is supernal plight."---This says it all, Jack. This has a combination of strength and delicacy...:)Amazing...
Gorgeous use of the language! I am in awe of poets who can rhyme like this -enhancing, not detracting from the poem! It's darkness saddens me though ... almost an elegy for all humans.
ReplyDeleteAlso loving the sunset imagery in first stanza and thanks for teaching me some new words.
ReplyDeleteI especially love "The remnant of daytime is fading to fable." The idea that a day becomes a myth once it turns dark is a delicious one.
ReplyDeleteDelicious wordplay... a delight!
ReplyDeleteJack - you old craftsman!
ReplyDeleteI love the opening--I could imagine it beautifully illustrated.
ReplyDeleteOh, I've missed your poems. This is another great one! Loved "the remnant of daytime is fading to fable." I just took a quite memorable trip, but the memories do almost feel like fables already.
ReplyDelete